- Clothes may not be hung to dry on Sunday.
- It’s illegal to dig ginseng on other people’s property between the months of April and September, according to an 1866 law.
- Licenses must be bought in order to own television sets, and even VCRs.
- It is illegal for a husband to beat his wife with a stick larger in diameter than his thumb.
- It is illegal to paint landscapes in times of war.
- It’s against the law to keep manure in a building unless the building is being used as a stable.
- One may not allow his or her dog to chase a squirrel in the summer.
- Adultery or Fornication results in a fine of $500 and/or 6 months in prison.
- You must pay a television tax whether or not you own a television
- Ice cream may not be eaten while standing on the sidewalk. (Repealed when Clint Eastwood was mayor)
- Sexually oriented businesses may not open for business on Sundays.
- There is a law defining what “new” means
- Ugly women must call out “Hideous Hag Coming” before entering a building where men may be.
- All motor vehicles must be preceded by a man carrying a red flag (daytime) or a red lantern (nighttime) fifty feet in front of said vehicle.
- A milk man may not run while on duty.
- Lawyers must not charge widows a fee for moving their piano from one room to another.
- It is unlawful to howl at ladies inside the city limits.
- It is forbidden to serve wine in teacups.
- Saying the name “George Washington” without adding the phrase “blessed be his name,” can land you with a fine of up to fifty cents.
- It is illegal to plant a garden in any public street.
- No monster may enter the corporate limits.
- Persons face up to thirty days in jail for selling oranges on the sidewalk.
- It is illegal to fly over any body of water, unless one is carrying sufficient supplies of food and drink.
- It is illegal to cry on the witness stand.
- A person must be eighteen years old to play a pinball machine.