Stupid State Laws

Stupid Country Laws

It was once illegal to not wear clothes while taking a bath in a bathtub.

Pickup trucks are not allowed to be visible after 7:00 pm

Since the 1960s, the city has banned people from parking their pickup trucks in their driveways or on city streets from 7 p.m. to 7 a.m.

After Aug. 8, 2011 Coral Gables will start issuing tickets to people who violate the parking ban. The first violation will cost $100. Afterward, code enforcement officers can issue [...]

Fiddlers and stay at home dads are considered vagrants

50-20 Vagrants. The following shall be deemed vagrants. (4) Common pipers and fiddlers. (13) Persons neglecting all lawful businesses and habitually spending all their time by frequenting hosues of ill fame, gaming houses and tippling shops. (14) Persons able to work but habitually living upon the livings of their wives or minor children.

It is illegal to gossip within city limits

50-5 Disturbing the peace. It shall be unlawful for any person within the corporate limits of the town to willfully disturb the peace of others by repeating or uttering slander, scandal, malicious gossip or rumour, calculated to provoke a breach of the peace.

No ass can stand on a sidewalk within town limits

10-1 Animals on sidewalks. It shall be unlawful for any person to hitch, ride or allow any horse, mule, ass or other animal to stand on any sidewalk within the corporate limits of the town.

It is illegal to eat cottage cheese on Sunday after 6:00 P.M.

Lap dances must be given at least six feet away from a patron.

Sec. 14-148. Prohibited activities.

(a) No person within an adult use shall, within six (6) feet of another person, display or expose any specified anatomical area or engage in any specified sexual activity, provided, however, that this provision shall not apply to prevent:

(1) Adult use employees or entertainers at an adult use from using [...]

Women may not expose their breasts while performing “topless dancing”.

Sec. 14-96. Female nudity for commercial exploitation.

(a) It is unlawful conduct in any commercial establishment for any person to procure, counsel, aid, assist or permit a female person to appear and expose, exhibit, display or reveal or for any female person to appear, expose, exhibit, display or reveal her nude breast or breasts or [...]

All houses much have white picket fences and full-width, two-story porches.

Seaside is a planned city that was intended to reflect 19th-century architecture. These stipulations are merely two among the many the city planners have devised that have led to the development of a city that looks somewhat like a Disney World resort.

Persons may not appear in public clothed in liquid latex.

Sec. 38-61. Definitions.

Nude means any person insufficiently clothed in any manner so that any of the following body parts are not entirely covered with a fully opaque covering:

(1) The male or female genitals.

(2) The male or female pubic area.

(3) The female breast.

(4) The buttocks.

Body paint, body dyes, tattoos, liquid [...]

Beer may not be sold between 2 and 7am.

Sec. 6-2. Hours of sale.

Alcoholic beverages may be sold, consumed or served or permitted to be sold, consumed or served in any establishment within the city from 7:00 a.m. each day until 2:00 a.m. the following day.

(Code 1976, § 3-5; Ord. No. 606, § 1, 7-20-94)

Persons may not tow a sled behind their bicycles.

72.45 TOWING.

No operator of a bicycle shall tow or draw any coaster, sled, person on roller skates, wagon, toy vehicle or other similar vehicle on any public road, sidewalk or public place.

(’74 Code, § 6-16) (Ord. 70-3, passed 4-2-70)

Neon signs are prohibited.

Sec. 106-34. General requirements.

(a) Permit required. It shall be unlawful for any person to erect or replace or modify the design of any sign, unless specifically exempt from permit requirements as listed in section 106-39, without first securing from the building official a written permit to do so. The applicant for such a permit [...]

No one may bring a pig with them to a theater.

Sec. 10-7. Keeping swine within city prohibited. It shall be prohibited for any person to have in his possession, control, management or custody any swine within the city. (Code 1964, § 4-6.8)

Termite farms are not allowed within the city.

Sec. 10-9. Keeping animals or vermin deleterious or harmful to public health or perilous to public safety prohibited; exception. It shall be prohibited for any person to keep, harbor or maintain any animal or vermin whose natural actions and presence are or may be deleterious or harmful to the public health or that may imperil [...]

Persons face up to thirty days in jail for selling oranges on the sidewalk.

Sec. 70-5. Selling food from open-air stands prohibited. The sale, keeping, storage or the offering for sale of any food from open-air stands in the city is prohibited. Such sale, keeping, storage, or the offering for sale of any food from open-air stands in the city shall be made only within the confines of an [...]

Skateboarding is not allowed at any police station.

Sec. 70-69. Responsibilities of bicyclists and skaters. (a) It shall be unlawful for any person to engage in bicycling, skateboarding, in-line skating, or roller skating in the following areas: (1) On the grounds of any public facility including, but not limited to, city hall, municipal parking garages, city police and fire stations, city public works [...]

You cannot use a whistle on a bicycle

It is illegal to sell ice cream in a cemetery.

Sec. 7-34. Merchandising, advertising and signs prohibited. (a) Vending and peddling. No person in any city cemetery shall expose or offer for sale any article or thing, nor shall he station or place any stand, cart, or vehicle for the transportation, sale or display of any such article or thing. (b) Advertising. No person in [...]

It is illegal to drive over graves in a cemetery.

Sec. 7-33. Traffic. (a) State motor vehicle laws apply. No person in any city cemetery shall fail to comply with all applicable provisions of the state motor vehicle traffic laws in regard to equipment and operation of vehicles together with such regulations as are contained in this and other ordinances. (b) Enforcement of traffic regulations. [...]

You may not lean your bicycle up against a tree in a cemetery.

Sec. 7-33. Traffic. (a) State motor vehicle laws apply. No person in any city cemetery shall fail to comply with all applicable provisions of the state motor vehicle traffic laws in regard to equipment and operation of vehicles together with such regulations as are contained in this and other ordinances. (b) Enforcement of traffic regulations. [...]

Torpedoes may not be set off in the city.

Sec. 15-38. Behavior. No person in a park shall: (a) Fireworks and explosives. Have brought, or have in his possession, or set off or otherwise cause to explode or discharge or burn, any firecrackers, torpedo, rocket, or other fireworks or explosives of inflammable material, or discharge them or throw them into any such area from [...]

If you wish to go swimming in the ocean, you must get dressed in your hotel room.

Sec. 15-37. Recreational activities. No person in a park shall: (a) Bathing and swimming. (1) Designated areas. Swim, bathe, or wade in any waters or waterways in or adjacent to any park, except in such waters and at such places as are provided therefor, and in compliance with such regulations as are herein set forth [...]

Destin law states that a cat that viciously chases passers-by is a “bad cat”.

Sec. 4-8. Bad dog; bad cat. (a) It shall be unlawful and a civil infraction for the owner or custodian of any dog or cat to permit it to bite, inflict injury upon, or otherwise attack a person or another animal without provocation. Any dog or cat which attacks and bites a person or another [...]

It is illegal for an owner of a store to allow another person to pass out free ducklings in front of the store.

Sec. 4-12. Sale or giveaway of certain animals. (a) It shall be unlawful for any person to sell, offer for sale, or give away in the city baby chickens, ducklings or other fowl under four (4) weeks of age, or rabbits under eight (8) weeks of age, to be used as pets, toys or retail [...]